support-487504_640THE LAST COUPLE OF MONTHS has been an intense time for me.  I’ve been in the process of launching the largest program I’ve every done, and I’m now seeing the results of that focus and energy.

I’m incredibly grateful for the wide range of supporters and partners who have helped me on this journey.  Honestly, I never would have attempted this without them.

But that got me thinking about what it’s like to be on the giving end of the relationship rather than the receiving end.  Because that’s a lot of what coaches do.

I suppose a part of why one would do this is because there’s an expectation of a reciprocal gain.  Sure, you give to charity because you think they’re doing something important in the world.  And you support your friend because, well, you think that’s what a friend should do.

In many other arenas, though, there’s a sense of mutual back-scratching, or karmic benefit, or whatever.

But if that’s the level you primarily operate at, you’re going to get awful frustrated.  Any kind of return is generally slow and ambiguous, so the sense that you’re receiving your “fair share” tends to be weak.

There’s another level, though:  To help others because there’s a higher principle at stake.  For instance, you might help someone to develop as a leader purely because you think the world needs more people in charge who have their head screwed on straight.

Or you might help another company to become successful because you like their values and approach.  Perhaps even if they’re a bit of a competitor to you.

When you raise your thinking to this level, you’re now out of the realm of win/lose thinking, of gain for the sake of accumulation.

Sometimes it’s wonderful to help people just because you want to be helpful.  You want to improve someone’s life.

And, to be honest, to be able to rejoice in their success with a bit of “I helped them do that!”


I help people create great business partnerships.  If you want to make this happen, let’s talk!  carl.dierschow@smallfish.us.

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